So far I have had my share of both hatred and blind, overpowering rage throughout my life.
I'll be the first to admit that on many mornings, evenings and days, I've longed for the destruction of all bipedal life on the planet. Innocence be damned, nothing be spared.
This anger has been directed towards the state of the world in general, what we are doing as a species, and the way we treat everything around us, from items to animals and people. However, my anger and rage is undefined. There isn't a political target, there isn't any opponent, there isn't a fear of losing my way of life due to intrusion into my privacy by the existence of people who do not think like me.
I do not fear a person in a veil, nor do I fear their hair colour or the fact that I do not understand their language or culture. However, I fear others, because of their anger and fear. I'm afraid of the people who are hiding, who feel so uncertain that they must stand up and fight against something. I fear the people who want to chase others away, because they in themselves are afraid. I fear the people who wish to deny others peace, because their peace of body intrudes on someones peace of mind.
I fear the people who wish to bear arms because their lack of knowledge and acceptance is questioned. I fear the people who urge _others_ to kill those who think differently. I fear the state of mind that seclusion brings, the way it renders it acceptable to use violence to prove a point. I fear those people who are so uncertain of themselves, that they cannot tolerate someone who speaks against them to live.
This level of ignorance makes me rage, a blind, consuming hatred of the people who enable this, of the people who refuse to sit down and breathe, who turn inwards into circles that only strengthen their own fear. It makes me fear for myself, my own safety and privacy, it makes me wish to bear arms against them.
It risks turning me into them.
I hate the people who preach such things, be they politicians who do it for the sake of the children or the old, or preachers of a religion, preachers that teach fear because they are in unknown territory, fleeing from Terror only to bring it to others.
I abhor this behavior in people, this blind, consuming stupidity that makes think that acting out on this fear will bring success.
It will only bring retaliation and fear, it will only sow distrust amongst others, and it will not make them join you. It will make them step aside, be separate and afraid, seek to like minded, scared people for comfort. It will make them want to bear arms against the other, secular and inhibited, fearful and angry people.
I hate them all.
And I'm one of them.
This is why I'm so upset right now, that even more are stepping into the comfortable circles of fear, distrust and anger. That more people want to bring retaliation and anger.
And this is why I'm so relieved that there are voices of sanity and compassion speaking up around this situation in Norway. That people are taking a marked step not to be consumed by Terror and rage, not to step into the circles drawn out before them. That they are taking the moment to breathe and point at the social trap in front of them, the knowledge that the seemingly senseless violence amongst them was in fact, not Senseless.
It was carefully planned, it was bait. Horrible bait, for people to step into a trap of anger and distrust. To step into the line of aggressors and prosecutors. To bring their own fear and anger towards others. To lead a nation, and a continent, into the tight circles of fearful terror, of seething rage and distrust.
Now, I just hope that they will find their way out of this horrible trap, without causing themselves more suffering.